The Science of
Precision Flatulence.
From wearable capture units to AI-optimised MY2T™ Refinery pipelines, FLATUTEC operates the most sophisticated biogenic methane infrastructure ever constructed. Here is exactly how it works, explained at a level of detail that will make you deeply uncomfortable about your own body.
The World's Most Sophisticated Wearable You'll Never Brag About
The MY2T™ Mark V is a discreet, ultra-lightweight biogenic capture device worn around the waist beneath normal clothing. It features our patented MY2T™ Core membrane — a graphene-nanofiber lattice that selectively absorbs methane molecules while allowing all other gases to pass freely. Nitrogen, oxygen, and any associated aromatics are vented harmlessly through a secondary activated-carbon layer. The device does not smell. We have tested this with a panel of 400 people and a very tired dog.
Onboard biometric sensors measure pressure, volume, temperature, and molecular composition in real time. Data is transmitted via MY2T™ Connect encrypted 5G to the nearest MY2T™ Refinery node. The contributor's daily, weekly, and lifetime yield statistics are available on their personal FLATUTEC dashboard, which several users have described as "strangely motivating."
- Weight: 87 grams. Lighter than your phone, heavier than your contribution to the energy grid before FLATUTEC.
- Battery: 72-hour continuous operation. Charges via USB-C. Also harvestable kinetic energy from walking, though yield is negligible.
- Capture Efficiency: 99.1% methane retention. The remaining 0.9% is subject to active litigation with Physics.
- Companion App: iOS & Android. Real-time yield graphs, dietary recommendations, and a community leaderboard we strongly advise not showing at dinner.
Molecular Telemetry at Scale — Anonymously, Securely, Inexplicably
The MY2T™ Connect network handles data packets representing the collective biogenic output of 847 contributors across Poland. Every packet is anonymised at source using zero-knowledge cryptography, meaning FLATUTEC can calculate exactly how much methane you contributed without knowing it was you. Your gas is yours. We just monetise it on your behalf. The DC expansion will add a second node to the network in Q3 2026. The projected contributor count for DC is not yet disclosed. Our atmospheric survey data suggests we are being conservative.
The transfer protocol does not physically move gas. To be clear: your body's output is captured, quantified, and logged as an energy credit. The equivalent methane volume is then drawn from the nearest MY2T™ Refinery tank to match your contribution to the grid. Think of it as a very unusual bank. You deposit gas. We deposit clean energy credits to your account. No tubes run to your house. We want to be very clear about that.
- Latency: Sub-200ms from capture to credit. Real-time feedback in the MY2T™ App.
- Security: AES-256 encryption. Your contribution data is more secure than your medical records and considerably more interesting.
- Coverage: 94% of urban and suburban areas across all 50 US states and 18 partner nations. Rural extension programme launching Q3 2026.
Where Biology Becomes Electricity. Sort Of.
FLATUTEC operates 1 MY2T™ Refinery node in Warsaw's Praga district, housing our proprietary MY2T™ CatalyticCore methane extraction system. Biogenic gas inventory — sourced from the Łomianki residential programme, Warsaw contributor network, and an extremely enthusiastic contributor in Praga Północ whose identity we are still working out — is processed in multi-stage catalytic chambers that extract pure CH₄ at 97.3% efficiency. The remaining 2.7% is a trace mixture processed further into agricultural fertiliser sold to farms near Łomianki. Nothing is wasted. Not even whatever it is that Subject 7 is contributing. Especially not that.
Each node is overseen by MY2T™ AI — the FLATUTEC Global AI Analytics system — which monitors feed quality, optimises combustion ratios, and autonomously adjusts processing parameters based on real-time grid demand. MY2T™ AI was initially named "Gerald" during development. The engineers voted to change it. Dr. Toots wanted to keep Gerald. Gerald lost.
- Daily capacity: Up to 2.4M m³ per node at peak yield.
- AI model: MY2T™ AI v4.1, fine-tuned on 7 years of biogenic methane composition data and an unknown quantity of dietary records.
- Byproducts: CO₂ (captured and sold), nitrogen fertiliser (sold to agricultural sector), and a residual compound our chemists have named "Eau de Process" (not sold, never sold).
The MY2T™ Pipeline — Step by Step
A complete technical overview of how your contribution travels from your body to the national grid. We have made this as clinical as possible.
1. Biological Production
The human digestive system produces between 0.5 and 2.5 litres of intestinal gas per day depending on diet, microbiome composition, and what the contributor had for dinner. High-fibre meals, legumes, cruciferous vegetables, and carbonated beverages are associated with elevated yields. FLATUTEC publishes a free Dietary Optimisation Guide (the "Yield Bible") available on request. It is 94 pages long and extremely detailed.
INPUT VARIABLE — DIETARY DEPENDENT2. MY2T™ Capture
The MY2T™ Mark V captures biogenic gas at point of emission. The MY2T™ Core membrane selectively retains methane while venting all other components. Molecular composition is sampled and quality-graded in milliseconds. High-grade CH₄ yields earn bonus energy credits. Low-grade yields (primarily nitrogen) are still captured and logged, but earn "Participation Credits" worth slightly less, which contributors unanimously prefer we not call "Effort Bucks."
CAPTURE EFFICIENCY: 99.1%3. MY2T™ Connect Telemetry
Captured data is encrypted, anonymised, and transmitted to the nearest MY2T™ Refinery node in under 200 milliseconds. The contributor's energy credit account is updated in real time. They receive a push notification. The notification reads "Contribution received. Thank you." We considered making it more personal. Legal advised against it.
LATENCY: <200MS / ENCRYPTION: AES-2564. Quality Assessment & Local Storage
Before entering the collective pool, each captured batch undergoes a quality assessment pass by the MY2T™ AI sensor array. CH₄ purity grade, sulphur compound content, and moisture level are logged against our intake thresholds. Batches that pass are held in the contributor's local device buffer — a sealed, pressure-stable micro-reservoir in the MY2T™ Core — until the device syncs with the nearest Refinery node. Once cleared, the batch is released into the pooled biogenic inventory. Batches that fall below grade are logged as Participation Credits and flagged for dietary advisory follow-up. Nothing is discarded. It is simply, in some cases, graded honestly.
QUALITY GATE PASS RATE: 94.7% / LOCAL BUFFER: UP TO 72H5. MY2T™ Refinery Processing
The MY2T™ Refinery node draws from its pooled biogenic inventory an amount of gas equivalent to the contributor's logged credit. MY2T™ AI processes this through three catalytic chambers, extracting pure methane, separating and selling CO₂ credits, and converting trace compounds to fertiliser. The whole process takes 4.3 seconds on average. For context, it took approximately four hours to eat the meal that ultimately made this possible.
EXTRACTION EFFICIENCY: 97.3%6. MY2T™ Grid Distribution
Refined biomethane enters the MY2T™ Grid network — our proprietary smart-grid integration layer — and is routed to combined heat and power (CHP) generation units supplying homes, businesses, and datacenters. Energy is indistinguishable from conventionally-sourced gas at point of delivery. Your home runs on clean biogenic methane. You chose this. You are, in a very literal sense, the power station.
GRID UPTIME: 99%+ / COVERAGE: 18 NATIONSWhat's Coming Next
Our R&D team files an average of 2.3 patents per week. These are the projects we're allowed to discuss.
MY2T™ Mark VI — "The Phantom"
A next-generation capture unit so lightweight and discreet it is functionally invisible under clothing. Integrates directly into waistband elastic. Features a new passive-collection mode that operates without any voluntary action from the contributor whatsoever. Legal is reviewing what "voluntary" means in this context.
MY2T™ AI Dietary AI — "MY2T™ Coach"
A personalised AI nutrition service that analyses your biome, meal history, and yield data to recommend dietary choices that maximise methane output without compromising quality of life or social standing. Early beta users report a 34% yield increase and "a complicated relationship with lentils."
MY2T™ Grid Enterprise API
A developer API allowing commercial buildings, municipalities, and large campuses to integrate directly with the MY2T™ Grid network as both producers and consumers. The first Polish pilot is running at Warsaw Expo XXI. The events team has quietly adjusted the catering towards a higher-fibre menu. Results are "promising." The building manager has filed two enthusiastic progress reports and asked that we not name the venue publicly. We have named it here because it is on the venue's own website. We consider this within the spirit of the request.
Bovine Expansion Programme
Cattle produce up to 500 litres of methane per day — 200 times the human average. FLATUTEC is piloting a bovine MY2T™ unit (working title: "MooPak™") across three farms in New Zealand. Early yield data has caused our CFO to sit very still in a chair for several minutes.
Project STRATOSPHERE
A satellite-based atmospheric methane recapture programme. Several governments have asked us not to discuss this. The UN has sent three letters. We are in dialogue. What we can confirm is that the project exists, the acronym stands for something genuinely impressive, and the required orbital altitude is "lower than you would expect."
MY2T™ Certificate Contributor Certificates
Blockchain-verified proof-of-contribution certificates for Elite Emitter tier members. Each NFT is uniquely encoded with the contributor's cumulative yield data and carbon offset equivalent. When asked if these have any monetary value, our legal team said "please do not ask us that again."